Celebrating Autism Progress – Autism Parenting Magazine

Do you ever doubt your own courage? Have you ever felt inadequate in comparison to other parents and their accomplishments? Have you ever considered, though, that courage could be based on perspective? Curiously, do the same set of rules that adults struggle with actually hinder our view of true courage in our children?

It is a question worth asking again. Could courage be based on perspective?

For autistic children, or children with sensory processing disorder (SPD), courage may look completely different from the world’s perspective or definition of courage. Who is to say that one child is more courageous than another?

Examples of the world’s perspective on courage

A courageous child:

• Is willing to slide down the tall firepole at the park at a young age
• Wants to participate in an epic swing-jumping competition during recess
• Has no problem entering a crowded arena and attempting to participate in a motorbike or horse race with other teens
• Jumps off the high dive at the community pool because everybody else can do it
• Performs that prized solo dance in front of a large, cheering crowd

Of course, there is nothing wrong with a child performing these acts of courage. Yet, what if your child (or mine) will never feel comfortable doing such courageous acts?

Is your child (or mine) less or inferior in any way? Absolutely not! Far from it!

I propose to you that true courage is based on nothing more or less than one’s personal perspective. Your child, as well as mine, do incredibly courageous acts each day. You have a right to be completely pleased with what your child can do, even if it does not come close to the world’s perspective of true bravery.

Examples of your child’s true courage

Your autistic or sensory child:

Gets out of bed every morning, despite the sensory-rich and overloaded world around them

• Accomplishes a challenging homework question in a loud classroom setting
• Enters that loud birthday party without shrieking and dropping to the ground like they did three years ago
• Does not scream nearly as long or quite as loud (compared to usual) when they scrape a knee on a hot, sunny day
• Wears that uncomfortable outfit for thirty minutes for Family Picture Day

Progress, progress in a seemingly-overloaded and hectic world…this should make any parent genuinely proud! Plus, progress does not have to be big or fast, and true progress may only be noticeable to parents. Parents of all children should be excited by any amount of progress because it is courageous for anyone to move forward in a scary world.

The takeaway

Go ahead, you can quietly jump up and down and whisper proclamations of “wooowhoooo” when your precious child does something new that you rightfully label as brave. Celebrate these progressions of success because they are genuinely successful acts of bravery!

Progress does not mean your child will ever be able to do any of the above-listed courageous acts (in the world’s eyes, at least). Progress may look like seeing your child perform an activity or hold back a big emotion that you never thought possible. This is courageous for your special child!

Indeed, your child may never be brave according to the world’s perspective, but you and I know better. Your child is one of the bravest out there!

Continue being the best parent possible for your awesome child! Keep being your child’s best cheerleader. Do not follow the world’s way. In your child, see courage for what it is. Along the way, you will find that you show incredible amounts of courage, too. Breathe easy; you and your child are genuinely courageous in my eyes.