Understanding People Games - Autism Parenting Magazine

A mother shares how people games with her daughter changed their lives.

When we received our daughter’s autism diagnosis in 2019, we had no idea we would learn so much in the years that would follow. We also realized that we didn’t know much about the natural development of children. We felt like it was all a natural learning process that needed very little help. That wasn’t the case for our daughter; she needed our help.

Luckily, our daughter was diagnosed at the very young age of 23 months. I say luckily because the one thing I knew for sure was that early intervention was a huge advantage in a child’s development.

I decided early on that I would devote the next few years of my life to my daughter, and do whatever I had to do to help her bloom in her own unique way. I am happy to tell you that our investment paid off.

She went from a little girl who wouldn’t speak, who would play by herself, who would scream at the sound of a garbage bag being whipped, and who barely interacted with her own grandparents, to this blooming young girl with lots of things to say, giving hugs and jumping up and down when she sees her grandparents rolling down the driveway.

Two years later, we have seen huge progress in her gross motor skills, her social interactions, her communication skills, and so much more. I’m often asked what really changed everything for us. I have to say that increasing her social interactions has been THE key to her blooming development.

The one thing that changed everything for us was people games. It sounds so simple, right?

When I say this, people are often surprised. Believe me, I was surprised too.

I still remember when the therapists told us we’d have to do these games, over and over again. I felt drained just by the idea of being “ON” all the time, and I won’t lie, we were often drained and exhausted.

The more we played people games, the more she interacted with us. I don’t blame her. We were pretty awesome and fun, if I can say so myself!!

We played with her all the time. I would create people games with her favorite toys. I would take advantage of bath time to get her attention, as she couldn’t go anywhere! We would literally play all day. It was exhausting. The house was a mess, but this was our top priority; nothing else mattered to us.

Then, one day she started making requests. I still remember how excited we were! We just couldn’t believe it.

Every time she requested something, we would drop everything and answer her request. Again, it was overwhelming at times, but we knew that this was everything for her.

People games let us enter her world. People games showed her how fun it was to interact with others. People games gave her a voice.

People games changed our lives. It definitely changed hers. I am 100% positive of that.
So now you might wonder, what are people games?

What are people games?

In a short answer, people games require two people to play. You can’t play alone, which is key for our kids on the spectrum. You want them to see how fun it is to play together.

These are usually social games that don’t use toys, but I have to say that we have incorporated some toys at times to increase her interaction. For example, we would use her favorite stuffed animals and hide them under a blanket, or we would use her stuffed monkey to make him jump off the bed.

Here are a few examples of people games that we would often play with her:

Peek-a-boo
Blanket Pull
Sing Action Songs (5 Little Monkeys, Old MacDonald Had a Farm – we used her stuffed animals here)
Tickles
Rough play

I’ll elaborate on one example to show you how we were creative by matching her interests with some games.

Old MacDonald Had a Farm Song – my daughter was in love with her stuffed animals, so we tried to get her as many farm animals as possible. We would sing the song and use the stuffed animal when they came up.

They would do some crazy things and then come tickle her. At some point, we also modified the song to make it her farm by adding her name to the song. She thought it was so funny. It really captivated her attention.

I didn’t understand this concept until I started working with my daughter, but it’s so simple.
Children won’t learn to talk until they learn how to interact with others.

It’s so simple, but so powerful! Your child won’t talk until he/she understands the need to talk, and he/she won’t have that need until he/she interacts. So people games are amazing at creating that connection with your child.

It’s easy for children to focus on the person during people games, as the games are simple and repetitive. Repetition is key, as they will learn the routine, and they will anticipate the actions.

People games are simply fun, and they capture your child’s attention so easily. You might have to get a little creative, perhaps change the tone of your voice, and maybe act a little crazy at times too. Once you get your child’s attention, his/her eye contact will increase over time, he/she will interact more, and at some point, they may even make requests for you to do it again!

It’s not instant magic. You do need to invest your time and efforts into creating these people games and continually play with your child. Once you find those special games that your child can’t get enough of, play as much as you can.

It is the best therapy you can give your child, and best of all, it’s free and you can do it anywhere you’d like. You will be as proud as I am to have invested all this time and energy in your child once you see them bloom.

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